Monday, July 20, 2026

Held When We Cannot Hold On

When human minds and systems fail, as seen in the tragic violence in dementia care, we can find comfort in the truth that God's memory is perfect and He promises to carry His children securely to the end.

Listen to me, you descendants of Jacob, all the remnant of the people of Israel, you whom I have upheld since your birth, and have carried since you were born. Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

Isaiah 46:3-4

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39

My dear friend, it is difficult to read a story like the one from NPR about violence erupting in dementia care facilities. It is a story layered with sorrow. There is the sorrow of the disease itself, which cruelly unravels the mind of a person we love. And then there is this added horror: that the places meant to be sanctuaries of care can become sites of confusion, fear, and even violence. When we entrust a parent or a spouse to a facility, we pray for their safety. To hear that the systems designed to protect the most vulnerable are failing is a heavy, heartbreaking burden.

In the face of such profound brokenness, we are confronted with terrifying questions. Who is my mother, my father, my beloved, when their memories are gone? When they can no longer recognize me, or even themselves? When their personality is altered by disease, what remains of the person I knew? And where is God in this long, painful goodbye?

It is in these moments of deep human frailty that God speaks a word of divine, unshakable constancy. Take heart and listen to His promise in the book of Isaiah: "Listen to me... you whom I have upheld since your birth, and have carried since you were born. Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."

What a tender and powerful promise. God’s relationship with us does not depend on our ability to remember Him. His grasp on us does not depend on our strength to hold on. From the moment of our birth, He says, He has been carrying us. And that divine act of carrying does not end when our minds begin to fail or our bodies grow weak. In fact, it is precisely then that the truth of His promise shines brightest. When we cannot carry ourselves, He carries us. When our memory fades, His is perfect. He made us, and He will not forget us. The core of who we are—the soul He knit together—is held securely in His memory and His love, even when it becomes unrecognizable to us.

This is why the Apostle Paul could write with such certainty: "For I am convinced that neither death nor life... nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Dementia, in all its tragic power, is still just a thing “in all creation.” It cannot sever the bond of love that God has forged with His child in Christ. The person you love is not lost to God. They are held. They are carried. They are sustained.

So today, let us rest in that assurance. Let us pray for peace for those lost in the fog of dementia, for strength and compassion for their caregivers, and for protection in places of care. And let us find our own ultimate security not in the stability of our minds or bodies, but in the steadfast arms of the God who has promised to carry us all the way home.